Healing Isn’t Linear

By Megan Allcock, AMFT

With the start of the new year I think there is often this pressure for people to reflect on what they did in the past year and how they want to be “better.” Now there isn’t anything inherently wrong with reflection and wanting to grow, in fact it’s a wonderful aspiration to have. I think sometimes though it doesn’t leave room for the idea that many things in life take more than a year to heal, process and move on from. And even when it is healed, there will always be difficult days or moments of struggle because healing isn’t a linear process.

Let's use asthma as a metaphor here. Typically, asthma is worse in the winter because the dry air can irritate the airways. Now in the summer someone’s asthma will still exist but perhaps isn’t as severe. Similarly, if someone with asthma is working out that could cause a flare up more than sitting on the couch. Now if we think about mental health this way, I think there is a lot more flexibility in the space and grace we can give ourselves to heal.

With trauma and mental health in general, there will be seasons of life where something is more triggering than other times in life. Let’s say for example someone has mostly processed a childhood trauma experience, but they get into a new relationship and their new partner does something that brings up feelings related to their initial trauma. There will be moments that people don’t feel fully healed anymore from that. It doesn’t undo all the work they’ve done, but it really drives home the point that healing isn’t linear. It is OKAY to have time periods that are more difficult than others. There are so many factors that contribute to having bad mental health, so next time you want to be mean to yourself practice reminding your brain that healing isn’t linear and bad days are all a part of the process.