Guiding Yourself: Progressive Muscle Relaxation

By Jessy Weston, AMFT

In the midst of life's hustle and bustle, finding moments of calm can feel like an elusive quest. I often find myself sitting with clients who are struggling to navigate stress and anxiety in their lives and are unsure of how to slow down. In those moments, I find it can be helpful to practice a mindfulness exercise together. One of my favorite mindfulness techniques is progressive muscle relaxation.

Progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) is a relaxation technique based on the concept that physical tension and mental stress are closely connected. Developed by American physician Edmund Jacobson in the early 20th century, PMR aims to reduce both physical and mental stress by systematically tensing and then relaxing different muscle groups in the body.

The theory behind PMR is rooted in the idea that when we consciously tense and then release muscle groups, we become more aware of the physical sensations associated with tension and relaxation. This heightened awareness allows us to recognize and differentiate between states of tension and relaxation more effectively. By repeatedly practicing PMR, we can learn to identify when we are holding tension in our bodies, even in day-to-day situations. Over time, PMR can lead to reduced muscle tension, decreased anxiety, improved sleep, and an overall sense of calm and well-being.

Step 1: Find a Quiet Space

Choose a peaceful environment where you won't be disturbed. Sit or lie down in a comfortable position, and close your eyes if you feel comfortable doing so.

Step 2: Focus on Your Breath

Take a few slow, deep breaths to ground yourself. Inhale through your nose, feeling your lungs and belly expand, and then exhale slowly through your mouth, releasing any tension.

Step 3: Tense and Release

Begin with your toes. As you inhale, curl your toes tightly, feeling the tension in your foot. Hold for a few seconds, then exhale as you release the tension. Notice the difference between tension and relaxation.

Step 4: Move Up the Body

Continue this process, moving progressively up your body. Focus on each muscle group for 5-10 seconds before releasing:

• Calves and shins

• Thighs

• Abdomen

• Chest and back

• Shoulders

• Arms and hands

• Neck and throat

• Face (forehead, eyes, cheeks, jaw)

Step 5: Embrace Sensations

As you work through each muscle group, pay attention to the sensations. Notice how tension feels different from relaxation. Notice the soothing sensation of letting go.

Step 6: Slowly Return

When you're ready, gently bring your awareness back to the present moment. Wiggle your fingers and toes, stretch your body, and open your eyes if they were closed.

Sleep Anxiety Struggles

By Nicole Marino, AMFT

Falling asleep can sometimes seem like a battle, especially when anxiety starts to creep in and suddenly all of your worries are swirling around in your mind. It is truly hard to fall asleep, even if your body is tired, when your mind won’t rest. Everyone is different and there is not one magical tip that works for all, but by changing some routines and habits around nighttime, it may help improve overall relaxation and worry leading up to bedtime!

1. Try sleeping focused meditations: Meditation’s purpose is to bring you into the present moment, to ease your mind, and to focus on your breathing. There are so many different types of meditations to try, but looking up sleeping meditations (use of an app or just searching in YouTube) can be very useful when it comes to relaxing a busy mind. Body scan meditations are specifically helpful when it comes to this because you are guided through focusing on each individual part of your body and relaxing any tension in your body.

2. Write a list of everything you are worried about: Sometimes our anxiety feels like it holds so much power, but when you write out your concerns, you are taking the power back. Often times, listed out, our worries and fears don’t look as scary or overwhelming as we once thought.

3. Focus on the things within your control: Following that, focus on the worries or concerns that are within your control. Often times, anxiety focuses on things that are completely out of our control and we have no power altering. Let go of the things that we cannot change because it may never even happen. Your anxiety is not a fortune-teller of what is to come in the future. It is just our fears turned into anxious and negative thoughts. Also, it is important to focus on the things you can control right in that moment because I bet there are not a lot of things that you can do while you’re in bed trying to fall asleep.

4. Read: This is a very relaxing activity to do before bed and can keep your mind busy leading to tiredness.

5. Create a bedtime routine: Going off of reading, creating a nighttime routine focused on relaxation and non-stressful activities/tasks is very beneficial when it comes to easing sleep anxiety. Creating a routine of things you look forward to doing is a form of self-care. Whether that is doing your skincare routine, reading, stretching, journaling, showering, or meditating, the key is to focus on the tasks that are not going to cause additional worries or concerns, but the activities that are going to cultivate calm energy.

6. Avoid use of screens: If possible, not looking at your phone before bed is a healthy sleep time habit. When you look at your phone screen or TV, your brain is stimulated and “lights up” delaying when you start to feel sleepy.

7. Avoid harsh lighting: Similar to use of screens, turning on bright lights at night can wake you up and do the opposite of relaxing you. Studies show that red light therapy can help with both depression and anxiety. Because of this, switching your bedroom lights to red lightbulbs can help ease anxiety especially before bed.

8. A to Z technique: This technique is helpful once again to focus your mind on something low risk, fun, and calming. You can pick any topic or category you would like (sports, food, songs, shows, animals, etc.) and go A through Z naming one thing within the topic that starts with each letter of the alphabet. This is a fun twist on “counting sheep”!

9. Listen to calming music or relaxing noises: This can definitely be different for everyone, but listening to classical music, rain sounds, ocean sounds, or even just using a white noise machine can help your mind have something to focus on rather than what you have to do tomorrow.

As stated before, not everything listed is going to work for everyone because everyone is unique and different! The purpose of this is to give techniques and tricks to try out when it comes to combating sleep anxiety. It never hurts to try something new especially when it comes to taking power back from your anxiety at night! It is so important to be getting enough rest at night so don’t let your anxiety focus on the countdown till the morning, but focus on the present moment and what you can do to help destress and get to sleep quicker.