Let’s Talk About It: Suicide

/ Focht Family Practice/
By Rachel D. Miller, AMFT

By Rachel D. Miller, AMFT

Suicide remains a taboo topic in our society but failing to talk about it does not prevent it from happening. Instead not talking about it creates stigma for suicide survivors, their families, and those whose loved ones die by suicide. It also reinforces the myth that suicide should not be openly discussed. September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month making it the perfect time to talk about it.


Let’s start by looking at its prevalence in the United States.

  • Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US for all ages (CDC)

  • Approximately 123 Americans die by suicide every day (CDC)

  • There is a death by suicide every 12 minutes in the US (CDC)

  • White males accounted for 69.67% of suicide deaths in 2018 (CDC)

  • In 2018, firearms accounted for 50.57% of suicide deaths (CDC)

  • There were an estimated 1.4 million suicide attempts in 2018 (CDC)

  • Lesbian, gay, and bisexual kids are 3x more like than straight kids to attempt suicide at some point in their lives (SAVE).

  • 41% of trans adults said they had attempted suicide in one study. The same study found that 61% of trans people who were victims of physical assault had attempted suicide (SAVE).

  • Lesbian, gay, and bisexual young people who come from families that reject or do not accept them are over 8x more likely to attempt suicide that those whose families accept them (SAVE).


What is Suicide?

The National Institute of Mental Health (NIHM) defines suicide as “death caused by self-directed injurious behavior with intent to die as a result of the behavior.” A suicide attempt is “a non-fatal self-directed injurious behavior with intent to die as a result of the behavior” (NIHM). It may or may not result in injury. The term suicidal ideation refers to the thinking about, considering or planning suicide.

Signs and Symptoms

Knowing the warning signs and symptoms is key to suicide prevention. Some of these are:

  • Talking about wanting to die or wanting to kill themselves

  • Talking about feeling empty, hopeless, or having no reason to live

  • Making a plan or looking for a way to kill themselves, such as searching for lethal methods online, stockpiling pills, or buying a gun

  • Talking about feeling trapped or feeling that there are no solutions

  • Talking about being a burden to others

  • Withdrawing from family and friends

  • Changing eating and/or sleeping habits

  • Talking or thinking about death often

  • Displaying extreme mood swings, suddenly changing from very sad to very calm or happy

  • Giving away important possessions

  • Saying goodbye to friends and family

A more thorough list of signs, symptoms, and risk factors can be found here on the NIMH website. If you or someone you know is exhibiting any of the above, please reach out for assistance as soon as possible and prioritize safety, particularly if the behaviors are increasing or have developed recently. Crisis hotlines and additional resources are listed at the end of this post.

Myths

Myths about suicide further complicate our ability to talk about and prevent it. The World Health Organization has complied a pamphlet debunking the most common. You can find it here.

What to do if someone you know is in crisis?

It can be scary to recognize the signs of suicide in someone you know. Being uncertain about what to do or being afraid of doing the wrong thing can lead us to doing and/or saying nothing. Despite the myth that asking about suicide increases the risk, expressing your concern, and inquiring about whether they have a plan can be helpful. It is vitally important to let them know you care and to encourage them to get professional help. Learn more about what to do and say here and here.

Additional resources:

National Institute of Mental Health: Suicide Prevention

Suicide Awareness Voices of Education (SAVE)

Teens and Suicide: What Parents Should Know

How to Talk to Children and Teens About Suicide: A Guidebook for Parents

How to Talk to Your Child About Suicide

Talking with Kids About Suicide

Talking to Kids About the Suicide of Someone Close to Them

Telling a Child About a Suicide

Speaking with Your Teen About Suicide

What to Say to a Suicidal Teen

If you or someone you know is in crisis call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Lifeline) at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or text the Crisis Text Line (text HELLO to 741741). Both services are free and available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The deaf and hard of hearing can contact the Lifeline via TTY at 1-800-799-4889. All calls are confidential. Contact social media outlets directly if you are concerned about a friend’s social media updates or dial 911 in an emergency. Learn more on the Lifeline’s website or the Crisis Text Line’s website. (https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/suicide-prevention/index.shtml)

The Veterans Crisis Line connects Service members and Veterans in crisis, as well as their family members and friends, with qualified, caring Department of Veteran’s Affairs (VA) responders through a confidential toll-free hotline, online chat, or text messaging service. Dial 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1 to talk to someone or send a text message to 838255 to connect with a VA responder. You can also start a confidential online chat session at veteranscrisisline.net/get-help/chat.

The TransLifeLine is a peer support service run by trans people, for trans and questioning callers. Operators are located all over the U.S. and Canada and are all trans-identified. Trans Lifeline’s Hotline can be reached at 877-565-8860